President Trump is frightened of windmills. He has ordered his administration to launch a coordinated effort across multiple federal agencies to slow or stop offshore wind development, citing concerns ranging from health issues to national security threats. His initiative, led by Rasputin ghoul Stephen Miller and Chief of Staff Susie "radioactive waste" Wiles, has already resulted in the cancellation of $679 million in federal funding for wind projects and halted construction of the $4 billion Revolution Wind project off Rhode Island.