The advice columnist Eleanor Gordon-Smith suggests considering two aspects of a difficult relationship: whether you are hurt by the treatment you receive or by how you are perceived. The letter writer describes a challenging dynamic with their sister-in-law, acknowledging a personality mismatch. They suspect jealousy from the sister-in-law regarding their life with her brother and their children. To manage this, the writer often encourages their husband to spend time with his sister alone. Consequently, their interactions are primarily limited to monthly family gatherings. A recurring issue involves the sister-in-law sharply correcting the writer with disproportionate impatience. These corrections can feel mean-spirited, such as snapping while the writer speaks to her parents or laughing at pronunciation errors. The sister-in-law may also dismiss the writer's questions as overly simplistic. These exchanges are brief and often go unnoticed by others present. However, the writer's daughter and husband have both witnessed and acknowledged the sister-in-law's mean behavior.